Friday, January 11, 2008

The One Who Got Away

I was waiting
My feet are glued to the earth that has now turned into
thick liquid of sunsets
This earth,
that used to be my rock
was now the quick sand that would not
let me go
let me breathe
let alone let me leave
For I now remained cursed for the sins I thought were real.

So here I am
waiting for the one who managed to get away
and regardless of how thin was my skin
and regardless of how my conscience told me I was right
I defy the voice in my head and told my ego "i am not giving up on this fight!"
Coz I know.

So there I was,
remained cursed for the actions I thought were fully justified
waiting where these tears that continued to stream
tasted of nothing but the bitter sweetness of your lips
and these lips felt like nothing but the silkiness of you in between my hips
Wasnt I the one who had left you?
Werent you the one who finally let me go?

Coz if I am right
then why are these arms of mine
dead, dry and asleep for as long as I am here?
I remembered how you brought me back to life
And I remembered how my limbs moved like they've never moved before
they were alive,
and I know.

Coz they reminded me of how your touches and caresses
sent me to cosmological big bangs of anything and everything
where accidental bursts of euphoric blisses and
caramel raindrops exploding on the tip of my tongue
dripped with honey and milk and whatever that remind me
of your colours, colours that absorbed the shades of dusk and dawn
I was exploding with silent screams and pleasures that could only be
ecstasy raining on me over
and over
and over again

And that is when you would calm me down
with the embrace of your universe-like arms
they are endless,
scattered with divine constellations
that revolve around the beatings of your glorious sun-like heart
and even when I am secretly afraid of the dark
when the nights came, I seek for you
my brilliant shooting star.

But wasnt I the one who had screamed and shout?
Werent you the one who had shed tears and chose to never reappear?
Coz the wind kept on smelling of and reminding me of nothing else
but your salty ebony hair underneath my nose
and this hot clammy air doing nothing but kissing my toes,
before moving up the crevices of my feet, up to to my calves, thighs and
up to the temple of your goddess, who used to be me,
my temple where you used to worship,
follow
and swallow

I was the Divine, and you were the Worshipper
we made each other new and meaningful
I was there because of you
and you knew exactly how much I needed you
And I know exactly how I much I still need you
I know exactly how much baby
Oh I know.

But here I stood in the blistering night
and here the seconds crawled across me like thick lazy serpentines
and here I stood,
defeated by Time,
waiting for you to come back to me.